Ode on a Grecian Cookie Jar
Be gone evil temptress,
Trouble me no more!
Deceiver of lesser men,
Ally of the S’more.
Undoer of resolutions,
Killer of scales,
Transformer of minnows
Into monstrous whales.
You I desire,
And you I hate,
Push you away,
And then fill my plate.
Each tender morsel
That you contain,
Costs me 5 miles
Of running pain!
Wherein my knee joints
Declare words as such:
“Methinks thou dost
Partake too much!”
And how oft mine eyes
Have ye deceived,
With promises sweet,
That can’t be believed.
For when manna and chips
Chocolate methinks,
Are revealed oatmeal and raisin,
That stinks!
Deceiver of midnight
Snacks desiring,
Raising hopes
And then repining.
Should I give in,
Answer temptation’s call?
Should I eat?
Embrace the fall?
Not today!
Strong will I be,
Undaunted, unwavering,
And uncoweringly
I will resist,
I will not yield,
My strength is my sword.
My will, my shield.
I will not, cannot
In the house,
I will not, cannot
With a mouse.
And yet…
Tomorrow…
I could start afresh,
With renewed vigor
To deny the flesh,
Yes, tomorrow
Would be a great day
To begin again,
And to say,
“Carpe mañana” my mantra,
My fate,
Far less better is never
Than late.
No longer will I
My desire forbid,
I take you,
And remove the–
…”KIDS!!!”